Pets

We all know about service animals. The most commonly known is the seeing eye dog. These remarkable animals are trained and then utilized by the blind to help them see and get around. But what many don't know is that there are service dogs for many other causes including Autism. They are called therapy animals and are classified under the same service animal label. Now while these dogs don't do the same thing as a seeing eye dog would do, they do have many uses. For example.

The service dog that my daughter has is one that we have had since birth. He is a gorgeous Lab/Dane mix and very gentle and patient with her. Since he grew up with her and knows her very well he was a perfect choice. We really didn't have to do any special training as Savannah did not need help in that manner. He has however provided her with a friend, a companion and anther set of eyes for me. In fact, the dog's name was one of the first words Savannah said; "Shunshine" aka "Sunshine"

Now being a large dog, we were worried that she would eventually become scared of him or he would get to big. In fact the truth is the opposite. Savannah is actually afraid of small dogs I believe as a direct result of her thinking that a dog should be big.

There have been plenty of times when Sunshine would protect Savannah even from her own lack of self protection. He would lead her through the house when she was little and guide her towards me when I called her and she wouldn't respond. The older Savannah gets and the less she needs such attention, Sunshine has maintained his status as the Family Dog and keeps a warm place in our hearts. I know without a doubt that should the need arise, I can call on his instincts, training and love he has for my girls to aid them.

Also, since Savannah has been approved (a simple note from a family doctor stating that Savannah could benefit from a service animal) for a service animal, when ever we rented a place the owners could not refuse our application on the grounds of any 'no pet' clause. Since Sunshine is not listed as pet but her therapy dog.

If your child is suffering from lack of social skills (nothing socializes better than mans best friend) and other known issues associated with Autism, look into getting a animal that would be their alone to love. Start out with a young animal so the pet can grow up with child and include your child in the decision.

Look at each breed of Dog or Cat or the character of what animal your child chooses and get one that has the temperment that your child needs. You would be surprised at how much having a pet to love, to play with and to care for will help your Autistic child to smile. And as we all know, the smile of an Autistic child is worth more than a thousand words.

clothing

When Savannah was younger it was difficult to keep any clothes on her, as she got older we worked with it and it's gotten much better. But I have noticed that although she will wear clothes now and I don't have to worry about her stripping in the middle of Walmart with a blizzard blowing outside, she still prefers clothes that are loose and not restricting. She refuses to wear any pants with a button or snap, only elastic waste and she doesn't care for Denim. Also her shirts cannot be tight tees and long sleeves are also out.

She still has issues with her senses, such as cold and hot. She will wear a jacket in hot weather and take one off in the winter. She says she is not cold, although I can see the goosebumps on her arms. It makes me wonder why she doesn't seem to feel it when her body is giving all the outward signs of being cold or hot. She is worse with cold weather.

At this point, I got her a light jacket that wasn't too heavy thinking that this was the problem. Nope. So for lack of anything else, she is still made to wear a jacket when I feel it's needed. As for the rest. If she never wears jeans in her life...so what?! I will continue with stretched pants and sweat pants.

Colds and Autism

Caring for a sick autistc is hard enough. They either act as though a simple cold will kill them or a chopped off arm is nothing. It's one extreme or another, and giving medicine is like trying to catch the sun.

With my daughter she never tells me when she is feeling bad, so unless she has physical signs, (runny nose, cough) I have no idea she is sick. She doesn't even complain of headaches that go with having a fever. For this reason, her colds often go undetected. I have gotten in the habit of checking for a fever during the months that the flu is raging. When I or someone else in my house gets sick, I start keeping a close eye on her and checking for symptoms. It's a little bit more than I have to do with my TD (typically developing) kids, but chalk it up to life with an autistic child.

Nearly a year later

I really am bad at this blogging. I keep telling myself to get into it, but at the end of the day I am so busy focusing on the next day task I completely forget. I am going to attempt to force myself to post every day or at least every couple of days.

Well, my little girls still hasn't been able to understand menstrual cycles and the class was a total bomb. With her JR. High starting next year I am meeting with the health team and the psychology team to see what can be done. It still seems as though no one has ever faced this problem before. No one talks about it, no on has any idea. This is beyond stupid. So I will post all information and problem solving about it here as I go (if I can be a good little blogger and remember lol)

The first thing I have realized is I need to keep the explanation simple and I know that I am more afraid of how she will handle this then she will be when the time comes. I am lucky that my little girl has an older sister that has just hit her MC and I can use that to let Savannah get used to the idea and learn that it's normal.

As for explaining it. A friend made a really good suggestion. Tell her it's her body cleaning itself out. Because if you simplify the whole process, that's what it is. The body is cleaning out the extra blood it stored up to create a baby. Now if I add in that baby part, Savannah will believe that she is having a baby every month. Not good. So I will leave that out for now until she is older.

So for those of you looking for ideas. Introduce your daughter to it by not hiding your cycles from her. I know we do as a rule, but this isn't a time to coy, your Autistic child needs to understand and conventional ways may not work. I don't mean to get discusting with it, use common sense. Then when the questions start or even before they start, use the cleaning explanation if you are without one.

Let me know how it goes and if anyone has any other ideas that worked for them. (okay I have like 1 follower, but I'm trying. lol

Back Again

It's been a long time since I posted to this blog. Life raising 3 girls can get your mind on other things. The major thing at the moment is trying to explain to a 10 year old Autistic girl all about puberty and menstral cycles.

Still not sure how to handle this one. I have signed up my daughter for the puberty class at school and we shall see. Luckily she is high functioning. I have looked to many other places including doctors to try and discover a way to explain this to her, but to no avail. It's as if I am the first one with a female Autistic. It's more than frustrating.

You can bet as I go through this with her I will posting updates as they happen followed by a final report. Hopefully someone else will go looking for an answer and actually get one.

Raising a child is hard enough. Raising one with Autism, is infinatly harder. Answers to our questions are paramount. When we look around and get no responce it's very easy to feel alone and lost. Hopefully here there will some answers.

My daughter will go through this class the 18th I believe. Look back here for a full report on what happened and the reaction she has.

Autism at Play

I look out at my children running with the neighborhood kids, playing, laughing, running and I smile. Until I see one of my little angels alone and off to the side. She's playing with the voices in her head. She's avoiding the world around her for the world in her mind.

So what do I do? How do I get her to play with the others?

Sometimes if I go to her and play with them all she will join in for a while. But I noticed, that after only a few minutes she starts to cry or scream. The other kids pull away. She looses the glow about her and her smile is replaced with a frown. Once she goes back to playing by herself, her smile returns and hear her laugh.

Perhaps we has adults place too much on what should be done. We follow the directions of others and make our decisions based on what everyone else does. If she is happier to play by herself, who am I to say no? Am I right to force her to play with other children when she clearly does not want to? She will interact with others when she feels to needs to. When she wants something from them or they ask her a question. Yet when the necessity for interaction is done she happily goes back to her world.

As her mother all I want is for her happiness and well being. So long as she is happy playing games with the invisible friend she has in her head, so be it. I will not try to make her into what this world dictates as normal.

What's Wrong With That Child?

When you have a child with Autism that is a question you will hear more times then you can count. Every time your child has a meltdown in a store. Each time the begin punching themselves or jabber inconsistently at a family gathering. Yep, family is not immune. Anyone who does not understand Autism and its inner workings is going to think that your child is spoiled, or that you are simply not disciplining them.

“Spoiled Brat.” I can’t tell you how many times I have heard that from family and perfect strangers. It will wear on not only your nerves but break your heart as well.

How do you stop it?

Education.

You could stop everyone that makes a rude comment and explain to them what is going on but that can take up a lot of time and get tedious after a while. There are better ways to let people know that your child is not a spoiled brat without taking up half the day to explain it.

A simple and easy way is to print up business cards with a small amount of information about Autism on them. They explain basic information and can made up quite easily. You can find some that are pre-made and are easy to print out. Since they are small you can carry them in your purse or wallet and pass them out to anyone. Even family. The more people know the more they understand.

Another way is to purchase Autism Awareness T-shirt and merchandise. There are sites that have some great stuff to help promote Autism. Simply do a google search for Autism Merchandise and you will get all the leads you need. Do not be afraid or ashamed to tell the world that your child has Autism. The fact is, silence is your enemy. You must speak out most especially when your child cannot.

Now these methods are great and fine when explaining them to adults, not so much kids. Explaining to other small children or siblings so they understand can be difficult. Being the mother of three girls this is something that hits home.

My oldest and my youngest are not Autistic. Figuring out how to explain to them why their sister was screaming for no reason was not an easy thing to figure out. They didn’t understand words like, Autism, or Mental Disability. I can tell you how I explained it to them.

I started out by telling them that their sister’s brain simply worked differently then theirs did. That she needed more time to understand things.

Children with Autism hear and take in all the information and sounds around them.

My other children didn’t understand that fact. So I had to simplify it. I told them to imagine being in a small room filled with loud music and people screaming. I asked them if they thought they would be able to hear someone whispering from the other side of that room. That, they understood. I told them that this is how their sisters feels all the time and it is why we have to teach her differently.

It really didn’t take that long for them, even at 3 years old to understand what I was telling them and to realize the truth. I know it’s hard to listen to the sneers and ugly comments. I know the frustration you can feel. It’s not easy and you are not alone. The thing to remember is that ignorance is your enemy. Inform. Educate. Explain.